“Every now and then the stars align, boy and girl meet by the great design”. Lana Del Rey sure knows how to make you believe in fate and the notion that the entire universe is dedicated towards pulling two people together. However, the reality of the situation is that we live in the great Digital Age, which makes it a bit difficult to let fate take its course. With all the social media, dating sites included, there have never been more options when it comes to meeting potential partners, but these choices have spoilt us to the extent that, sometimes, we are unable to make one choice. In turn, there is a good chance you will actually miss your destiny and someone else will end up getting the person you have had your eyes and heart set on. In the spirit of not leaving things up to coincidences, karma and chance, we have come up with a list of secrets that are bound to get your crush to notice you amongst millions of other choices out there.
Use Science to Your Advantage
Sure, science is not the first place you would turn to for dating advice, but attraction is much more a thing of science than we are aware, and you can use it as a great aid in the romance department. The first thing to employ is positive body language. Certain guys lack cockiness and that level of self-confidence to immediately know someone is into them. Boys are not always that clever, so sometimes you have to draw them a map to show them that you like them, and in order to do so, yet remain subtle and classy, the safest approach is body language. When engaging in a conversation, make sure you smile, which shows interest in what he has to say. Casually touch his arm to show affection, and even toss your hair back a time or two. Playing with your hair or jewelry are also signs of positive body language. These signals tell a man that you are happy and open to romance, says psychologist Jeremy Nicholson in his article, Reading Basic Body Language for Dating and Persuasion Success.
Some Light Cyber Stalking
In order to answer the age old question – how to attract men – the Digital Age comes in really handy. What good does it serve if you do not use it to do a bit of digging on your crush? This is a thing we all do, and a thing none of us are proud of. However, a little light stalking, or to name it better – research, can go a long way. It can help you find out what kinds of clubs he likes, whether or not he plays a sport or a musical instrument, what kind of humor he is into, what his favorite food is. This and much more can transpire with a bit of skimming through his social media. After you have done your homework, once you are in his company, make sure you nonchalantly slip some of that information into the conversation. Casually bring up how you love to cycle or have the best coffee at his favorite place, and when he enthusiastically gushes about those same things, lightly suggest that you would love to do them sometime and he will surely make it a date.
Make Yourself Visible
The saying goes, out of sight – out of mind, right? In order to make your crush notice you, you have to actually be around. Befriend his friends, visit the same coffee place, and make it your goal to intentionally run into him ‘by accident’. The more present in his life you are, the more likely he will see how fun, great and wonderful you are and before you know it, you will be under his skin.
Play Hard To Get
Once he is in your life, give him attention, but withholding some of it will drive him crazy. Engage in conversations with other guys when he is around, showing him that you are not holding a torch for him, giving him the illusion that you are still playing the field and your interest is not set in stone. Once he feels like you might be slipping through his fingers, he will surely rush in to win you all to himself.
During the hunting process, karma will try to turn against you and make sure you look your worst when you run into the guy you like. Once he likes you, there will be plenty of opportunities for him to see you in your sweats and the messiest of the messy buns, but while you are still after him, make sure you look effortlessly stunning every time you leave the house – you never know when you will bump into him.
Stroke His Ego
Instant physical attraction opens the possibility of someone actually and truly liking you. We run into dozens of attractive people on a daily basis, but that does not mean that we would like all of them. What people in general and guys in particular find most attractive is being on the receiving end of respect. Show him that you honor and value the work he does, or how well he is doing in the education department. Compliment him on his accomplishments and ask to hear positive stories or anecdotes that feature him as the hero or a good-doer. One thing to bear in mind with this step is not to look like a fan-girl. Share stories of your own, and show him that you are just as good and accomplished as he is, that you have interests worth hearing, turn this kind of conversation into a two-way street.
Finally, if you want to go from physical attraction to a foolproof plan on making him yours, it is time to get personal, and that means going beyond flirtation and small talk. Ask him about where he grew up, what his childhood was like, about his family, anything that does not cross the line and transfer into prying. Share stories of your own, be funny, open and spontaneous. Show empathy. Guys love nothing more than a girl who seems to really care about his emotions and his background.